jusky

Watching MASH, the movie not the show.

Turns out I’ve never seen it before. It’s quite good. Also, that MASH song has lyrics.

stuff-that-irks-me:

obamadawn:

George W. Bush heard about Ft Hood, got in his car without any escort, and drove to the base. He was stopped at the gate to ask for directions to the hosp. then drove on. Bush requested to let him visit the wounded and the dependents of the dead. He stayed at Fort Hood for over 6 hours, until he asked to leave by a message from the White House. Obama flew in days later and held a “photo opportunity” session in a gym, and did not even go to the hospital.

Classy



http://www.snopes.com/photos/military/forthood.asp

stuff-that-irks-me:

obamadawn:

George W. Bush heard about Ft Hood, got in his car without any escort, and drove to the base. He was stopped at the gate to ask for directions to the hosp. then drove on. Bush requested to let him visit the wounded and the dependents of the dead. He stayed at Fort Hood for over 6 hours, until he asked to leave by a message from the White House. Obama flew in days later and held a “photo opportunity” session in a gym, and did not even go to the hospital.

Classy

http://www.snopes.com/photos/military/forthood.asp

What’s the best kind of tuna in a can?

Do I want solid or chunk? White or not white? Albacore? In water? In vegetable oil? In spring water? What brand is best?

What kind of canned tuna would an extremely knowledgable wealthy person buy?

Wait, I thought I didn’t like Drake.

I met Kyle Kinane last night. His show was amazing. He’s probably my favorite comedian. 

It should surprise no one who knows me that I was unable to stop talking even while the photos were being taken.

I met Kyle Kinane last night. His show was amazing. He’s probably my favorite comedian.

It should surprise no one who knows me that I was unable to stop talking even while the photos were being taken.

Nothing is more human than the umbrella.

Relentless nature has you surrounded and it pounds you and everything near you.

Resourceful man puts coverage on a stick and, shivering, holds it upright against the sky to protect himself, his tiny area, from what the sky sends down.

He can’t hold that thing forever.

And even if he could, an umbrella won’t last forever.

It gets battered, soaked, tested, and eventually it will fail.

But man, resourceful man, in all his cleverness, holds up his weak invention to protect himself and his tiny little area and thinks: But it also can’t rain forever.

You could never make up the idea that Elizabeth Moss was once married to Fred Armisen.

That is too weird. That’s like finding out that distant parts of the celebrity world were once neighbors. China and Mexico were neighbors when they were young. Now China is in Mad Men and says the best impression Mexico ever does is when it pretends it’s a normal fucking human being.

You guys ever watch the reality show “my cat from hell”?

The cat behavioral specialist comes and helps people to improve things with their super disturbed, fucked up cats.

Mostly he makes them take the lid off the litter box, puts in some stuff so the cat can climb—cats need vertical space to feel safe—and he teaches them how to play with the cat so that the cat can simulate chasing, catching, and killing stuff. That’s what cats dig.

Anyway, my new thing is watching this show on netflix and constantly yelling at the screen THEY DRUG THESE CATS! It started as a joke but now I’m convinced. When they show the improved cat at the end, I think someone gave it powerful cat drugs! That’s how you secure the happy ending for your tv show. You drug the cat.

It’s hard for me to believe that there are so many people who don’t have different passwords for the different sites they use.

I just read an entire Lydia Davis short story in the New Republic. It took two seconds. Now you can read it too. It’s called, “Bloomington.” Ready?

"Now that I have been here for a little while, I can say with confidence that I have never been here before."

To a Barbie doll, a pill of adderall is as big as a cheeseburger. If I could Indian-in-the-Cupboard a Barbie and give her an adderall, she would clean the fucking shit out of my apartment in no time—even though my apartment is to her the size of a small city. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ve been thinking about “size” a lot.

Guess what I’m doing May 15, 2015.

You damn right, son, Pitch Perfect 2!!!

A friend of mine wrote this. It has to do with the movie The Way We Were and also with an episode of Sex and the City but it’s about the problem of viewing ourselves in cinematic terms. The way we sometimes trick ourselves into loving characters instead of people. The way we sometimes borrow answers from books and movies instead of asking ourselves unpleasant questions.

You should read it.